Last night was one of the best and worst nights. Mark and I attended a dinner event to honor and celebrate the lifelong activism of the wonderful person that is Helene Dwyer. Helene is quite simply, one of the most amazing people I have had the honor of knowing. She is dying of ALS (Lou Gehrig's disease, also the disease that Stephen Hawking has). It was kind of a funeral before she goes. What a beautiful idea! Lori did a fantastic job of putting this event together. As a side note, it was also a fundraiser for the Helene Dwyer Greatest Need Fund, that is newly established. There is truly no better way to honor a woman like Helene that to do so while raising money to help the cause.
It was an extremely emotional experience. There are few people in this world who will leave the enormous void that Helene will leave when she passes. I absolutely HATE to cry in public, which has turned out to be somewhat of a joke, because somehow my 30's have been defined by frequent and profuse public weeping. I still hate it, even though it happens ALL THE TIME these days. Needless to say, I was a weeping, mucousy mess. My eyes are still sore and swollen today.
Since I last saw Helene, just a few months ago, she has gone from a walker to a wheelchair. She has lost a ton of weight and has become very gnarled and twisted. She still looked absolutely radiant last night. She was beautiful and as happy and concerned about others as she has always been. Many people shared funny, touching, and enlightening stories about Helene. I knew she has always been an activist of the most amazing kind. I knew she has cared tirelessly for cats and the many other animals she has rescued. At the time her illness was diagnosed, she had over 50 cats--all with FIV, feline luekemia, or diabetes. These cats were lovingly and meticulously cared for in a very clean home. She was by no stretch a hoarder. She did this while working as a philosophy professor (who just retired a couple of years ago). These cats required specialized, intensive medical care round the clock--IVs, medications, special diets. I know how much work my babies are, and I cannot imagine her responsibility, nor how she managed to stay on top of it. I knew that she was one of the kindest, most compassionate people I have known. I knew that she would do absolutely anything to help another living being. I knew she was fun and smart. I did not know, however, that she started out her adult life as a nun! That was a shocking surprise. I would easily put her at the same caliber as Mother Theresa, which for me is saying a lot. I have no respect or positive feelings for catholicism, AT ALL, but I deeply respect and admire Mother Theresa and the work that she did.
I felt so incredibly lucky to be a part of the event last night. I was struck by how many phenomenal people were in that room together. I am so very lucky to be a part of that family. I am accutely aware of just how lucky I am in so many ways. This seems to be the theme of my 30's--realizing that no matter what issues I face (health and finances mostly, oh, and the crappy teen years with my oldest too), I am and always have been lucky beyond measure. I was blessed with fabulous parents, who were able to provide for their family and loved us endlessly. I have been blessed again with my second family--the AR community. I will preface by saying I am not good at estimating numbers of people, and I don't know how many attended last night. I will just guess around 100. Some of those people I know well, some I don't know well, and some I don't know at all. I love them all, however, and know that we are a family. We share all of the values and issues that are important to us and would be there for each other in a heartbeat. They are all great people; people I am proud to know and honored to a part of. How many people in this world are lucky enough to have such a kick-ass supportive network?! There are so many strong, amazing women in the group--not that they are all women, but there are many great ones. I sat by Julie last night, another amazing woman, my mentor, and one of Helene's closest friends.
I am so glad that Helene was able to be the center of all that love and attention before she passes. It seems kind of silly that we wait until a person dies to come together and honor them in that way. She so deserved to hear how well loved and highly thought of she is! It was just beautiful.
We also got to see the televised interview that Helene did recently, speaking out against vivisection. She stated, as a woman dying of a disease with no cure, that it was still completely black and white--no question about it, animal experimentation is wrong. She would not wish to benefit from or have extra time granted to her at the expense of other living beings. My summary is so pathetic and weak compared to the succint power of her actual words, particularly given her obviously poor physical condition. She is and will continue to be an activist up until the very end.
Given all that I've said above, there's one more thing I have to say about Helene. Yesterday, while getting dressed (yeah, I even dressed up and put make up on for this), I ran down to grab the mail. In the mail I found an envelope with Helene's return address on it. Inside was a note with a check. She sent a donation from her fund for my vet bills--she said she wanted us to have it to help with some of the mountainous vet bills we have accumulated. I immediately, of course, cried. Here is this woman dying, in physical agony, worried about my foster cats and our situation. I was touched beyond words. Before I degenerate any more into rambling, I'll wrap it up here.
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